Starting Over

at

DaleTedder

New Veritas Newsletter is available

Click here to read.

Making Relationships with Your Children a Priority

Check out this great resource from Doorposts.

Also...check out their newsletter archives.

Second Chances

Clint and Penny Bragg learned even the most broken marriage can be healed by God's reconciling love.

by Dawn Zemke

Newlyweds and new Christians Clint and Penny Bragg were the darlings of their small church. She was on the worship team and the deacon board of missions. He led discipleship training. They taught Sunday school classes together and separately, helped organize the singles' group, and directed vacation Bible school. All while Clint juggled a job as area manager for a glass business and Penny completed her bachelor's degree and teaching credentials.

"We didn't know how to say no," Clint admits.

Yet despite the hectic schedule, their first year of marriage flew by without a hitch. On the surface, they seemed to thrive on the busyness. They didn't realize the marriage-building time they needed was being eaten up by the whirl of spiritual activity.

"It felt like God was blessing all our plans," Clint recalls. "But instead of going with or beside God, we were running ahead and asking him to catch up."

"We didn't have the spiritual roots of a strong, long-term Christian," Penny agrees. "We were still on the emotional high, very goal-driven."

Click here to read the whole article

Those Born 1939-1979

I'm not usually a big fan of email forwards, but this one was cute.

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!!

• First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant.


• They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes.



• Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered with bright colored lead-based paints.



• We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.



• As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, booster seats, seat belts or air bags.



• Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special treat.



• We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.



• We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.



• We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank Kool-aid made with sugar, but we weren't overweight because, WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!



• We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.



• No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.



• We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.



• We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's, no cell phones, no personal computer! s, no Internet or chat rooms........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!



• We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.



• We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.



• We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.



• We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!



• Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!



• The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!



• These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!



• The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.



• We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! If YOU are one of them...CONGRATULATIONS!



• You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good.



• While you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave (and lucky) their parents were.



• Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn't it?!

And speaking of the Good Old Days...

What were we thinking?

I have written here before of the need for homeschooling parents to have solid "first principles" regarding why they have prayerfully chosen to homeschool. On that note, here is an encouraging and heartwarming story about one family's decision to homeschool their children.

Here's a snippet...

The other day I was rifling through some old computer disks in search of one I could copy some files to. To my amazement, some of the disks still worked. More amazing was one Microsoft Word version 5 file I found from 1993, our first full year of "official" homeschooling. The file was named simply "WHY.doc."

I opened this little mystery nugget to find the brave declaration by parents of a six-year-old, parents who dared against cultural tide and conventional reason to homeschool. We lived at the time in a different country, far from support groups and curriculum fairs and far from American homeschool pioneers who could assure us we weren't crazy.

Here, we took our stand, though the neighbors thought us alien in more than nationality. Here we did what no one trying to fit into a foreign culture should do—homeschool. There were so many doubts and so many sleep-delayed nights pondering what could be wrong with us that we would risk ostracism and damage to our six-year-old and her little sister. Each morning, mothers waved their children down our little street of tightly-packed houses toward the government school. Only our school-age child remained at home. What was wrong with us? What were we thinking?

Click here to read the whole article.

from Homeschool Enrichment

But what about socialization?

Socialization: Homeschooling vs. Schools
By Michael F. Haverluck
CBNNews.com
April 26, 2007

Many homeschoolers share this sentiment when it comes to public schools, believing that the moral relativism, violence, peer pressure, drugs and promiscuity found inside their gates provide an inadequate setting to properly socialize their children.

Yet 92 percent of superintendents believe that home learners are emotionally unstable, deprived of proper social development and too judgmental of the world around them, according to a California study by researcher Dr. Brian Ray . What makes homeschool socialization such a hot topic?

With approximately 4 million children currently being homeschooled in the U.S., along with a 15- to 20-percent yearly growth rate, many professional educators and school boards are concerned that this exodus will keep funds from entering the public education system.

Many teachers also believe that successful home instruction by uncredentialed parents undermines their expertise and jeopardizes their jobs.

Click here to read the rest of the story.

Thanks to Homeschool Buzz

Should You Homeschool?

Here's a good article stating some more reasons why homeschooling your children is a good idea.

Here's an excerpt...

Over 2 million children are now homeschooled in the United
States. On standardized tests, homeschooled children outperform matched peers in the public schools by a wide margin, and they are comparatively more successful in getting admitted to competitive colleges.

Strikingly, homeschooled children do not show the “black/white” test-score gap that is the bane of public and private schools. Likewise, homeschooled children perform equally well regardless of gender.

In light of these ever more widely appreciated facts, perhaps you have considered homeschooling your own children. If you have, a good place to look for assistance would be the Web site of the Home School Legal Defense Fund. But here I simply wish to state the case for homeschooling. Why should you consider it?

Click here to read the rest of the article.

Thanks to Homeschool Buzz

Lobbying from Home

Homeschoolers are winning policymakers’ attention
By Michael Love

A group comprising less than three percent of America’s total enrolled student population is winning the attention of legislators and education policymakers. Though they are a tiny proportion of the public, homeschooled students and their families represent a group with impressive political heft. Their recent lobbying achievements include the incorporation of homeschooling provisions in the Career and Technical Education Improvement Act of 2006 and the passage of the Bennett Amendment protecting their grassroots lobbying in 2007. With the substantial recent growth of activity and remarkable success of such a small group, the homeschool network is emerging as a powerful lobbying machine.

click here to read the whole article.

from the Harvard Political Review online

Thanks to Homeschool Buzz

Tebow Bill

Local coaches don't like home school bill: Act would allow home schoolers to try out for public school activities

By Brent Maze

from the story...

Several county high school football coaches do not support a new bill that would allow home schooled children to participate in extracurricular activities at public high schools.

On Wednesday, the Senate Education Committee held a public hearing on the bill, which is being sponsored by Sen. Hank Erwin. The bill faced stiff opposition in the meeting, but the main reason Erwin is supporting the bill is to start a discussion on the issue.

"All we want to do is to allow home schoolers the same opportunity as those who go to public schools already," Erwin said.

The bill, dubbed the "Tebow Bill," would allow students to try out for sports, band and cheerleading. The name comes from University of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow who played for Nease High School in Florida even though he was home schooled by his parents.

Jemison High School football coach Brad Abbott doesn't like the idea because there will be two sets of rules for the players.

Click here to read the whole story.

Thanks to Homeschool Buzz

Raising Politically Incorrect Christians

from CrossWalk

by JoJo Tabares

Is it possible to manipulate truth and reality to make things look different than they really are? Have you ever wondered how the news media can appear to just relate the facts, yet seem to have a liberal bias at the same time? In a world in which not everyone is playing fair, we need to prepare our children to use critical thinking to spot deceitful techniques used to manipulate the truth.

"These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren." –Proverbs 6:16-19

Last time I shared about how our emotions can keep us from being effective communicators. You will need to keep your emotions in check as you read this article! Why? Because we're going to be looking at how some people and groups intentionally and systematically distort what we, as Christians, stand for. People can forgive more readily when they believe miscommunication or misrepresentation is unintentional. It is much more difficult to do so when you know it is a result of a calculated plan. However, as I said in the last issue, keeping your emotions in check is what makes for effective communication.

Click here to read the whole article.

Click here to read part 2.

55 Reasons to Homeschool

from National Home Education Network...

Reasons To Homeschool

1. Spend more time together as a family.


2. Spend more time with children when they are rested and fresh rather than tired and cranky from school.


3. Avoid having to struggle to get children to do the tedious busywork that is so often sent home as homework.


4. Allow children time to learn subjects not usually taught in their school.


5. Allow children to have time for more in-depth study than what is allowed in school.


6. Allow children to learn at their own pace, not too slow or too fast.


7. Allow children to work at a level that is appropriate to their own developmental stage. Skills and concepts can be introduced at the right time for that child.


8. Provide long, uninterrupted blocks of time for writing, reading, playing, thinking, or working so that the child is able to engage in sophisticated, complex activities and thought processes.


9. Encourage concentration and focus - which are discouraged in crowded classrooms with too many distractions.


10. Encourage the child to develop the ability to pace her/himself - this is prevented in a classroom where the schedule is designed to keep every child busy all the time.


11. Spend a lot of time out-of-doors. This is more healthy than spending most weekdays indoors in a crowded, and often overheated, classroom.


12. Spending more time out-of-doors results in feeling more in touch with the changing of the seasons and with the small and often overlooked miracles of nature.


13. Children learn to help more with household chores, developing a sense of personal responsibility.


14. Children learn life skills, such as cooking, in a natural way, by spending time with adults who are engaged in those activities.


15. More time spent on household responsibilities strengthens family bonds because people become more committed to things they have invested in (in this case, by working for the family).


16. Time is available for more nonacademic pursuits such as art or music. This leads to a richer, happier life.


17. Children will not feel like passive recipients of subject matter selected by their teachers. They will learn to design their own education and take responsibility for it.


18. Children will realize that learning can take place in a large variety of ways.


19. Children will learn to seek out assistance from many alternative sources, rather than relying on a classroom teacher to provide all the answers.


20. A more relaxed, less hectic lifestyle is possible when families do not feel the necessity to supplement school during after-school and week-end hours.


21. Busywork can be avoided.


22. Learning can be more efficient since methods can be used that suit a child's particular learning style.


23. Children will avoid being forced to work in "cooperative learning groups" which include children who have very uncooperative attitudes.


24. Children can learn to work for internal satisfaction rather than for external rewards.


25. Children will not be motivated to "take the easy way out" by doing just enough work to satisfy their teacher. They will learn to be their own judge of the quality of their own work.


26. Children will be more willing to take risks and be creative since they do not have to worry about being embarrassed in front of peers.


27. Children will be more confident since they are not subject to constant fear of criticism from teachers.


28. Peer pressure will be reduced. There will be less pressure to grow up as quickly in terms of clothing styles, music, language, interest in the opposite sex.


29. Social interactions will be by choice and based on common interests.


30. Friends can be more varied, not just with the child's chronological age peer group who happen to go to the same school.


31. Field trips can be taken on a much more frequent basis.


32. Field trips can be much more enjoyable and more productive when not done with a large school group which usually involves moving too quickly and dealing with too many distractions.


33. Field trips can be directly tied into the child's own curriculum.


34. Volunteer service activities can be included in the family's regular schedule. Community service can be of tremendous importance in a child's development and can be a great learning experience.


35. Scheduling can be flexible, allowing travel during less expensive and less crowded off-peak times. This can allow for more travel than otherwise, which is a wonderful learning experience.


36. Children will be less likely to compare their own knowledge or intelligence with other children and will be less likely to become either conceited or feel inferior.


37. Religious and special family days can be planned and celebrated.


38. More time will be spent with people (friends and family) who really love and care about the children. Children will bond more with siblings and parents since they will spend more time together playing, working, and helping each other.


39. Feedback on children's work will be immediate and appropriate. They won't have to wait for a teacher to grade and return their work later to find out if they understood it.


40. Feedback can be much more useful than just marking answers incorrect or giving grades.


41. Testing is optional. Time doesn't have to be spent on testing or preparing for testing unless the parent and/or child desires it.


42. Observation and discussion are ongoing at home and additional assessment methods are often redundant. Testing, if used, is best used to indicate areas for further work.


43. Grading is usually unnecessary and learning is seen as motivating in and of itself. Understanding and knowledge are the rewards for studying, rather than grades (or stickers, or teacher's approval, etc.).


44. Children can be consistently guided in a family's values and can learn them by seeing and participating in parents' daily lives.


45. Children will learn to devote their energy and time to activities that THEY think are worthwhile.


46. Children will be able to learn about their ethnicities in a manner that will not demean. Children will be able to understand multiculturalism in its true sense and not from the pseudo-multicultural materials presented in schools which tend to depict others from a dominant culture perspective.


47. Children will not learn to "fit into society," but will, instead, value morality and love more than status and money.


48. Children do not have to wait until they are grown to begin to seriously explore their passions; they can start living now.


49. Children's education can be more complete than what schools offer.


50. Children who are "different" in any way can avoid being subjected to the constant and merciless teasing, taunting, and bullying which so often occurs in school.


51. Children with special needs will be encouraged to reach their full potential and not be limited by the use of "cookie cutter" educational methods used in schools.


52. Low standards or expectations of school personnel will not influence or limit children's ability to learn and excel.


53. Children will be safer from gangs, drugs, and guns.


54. Parents will decide what is important for the children to learn, rather than a government bureaucracy.


55. Family will not be forced to work within school's traditional hours if it does not fit well with their job schedules and sleep needs.

New book for husbands-to-be...however distant that is

from Doorposts

We’ve been looking forward to the moment when we could announce the arrival of Doorposts’ new book, Prepare Thy Work: Preparing Young Men for Christian Marriage, written by our very own firstborn son, Daniel! We believe this book helps fill a gap that needs to be filled. What does it mean for a young man to “prepare his field” before he “builds his house?” What should he be “planting” during the precious years of his youth that will prepare him for establishing a godly household? When is he qualified to seek and win the heart of a young lady? Daniel has done an excellent job of helping young men and their parents think about these questions. Packed with Bible studies, evaluation questions, counsel from godly men, practical projects, and helpful resources, Prepare Thy Work helps young men properly order their lives and goals – preparing for their callings first, and then pursuing courtship and marriage. Chapters include:

Click here to read the whole advertisement...and order.

Possible Problem with Homeschooling...

Wierd kids

40 Ways for Fathers to Make a Difference

by Michael Farris

Michael Farris's lists are always helpful, fun (and convicting) to read. Here's a great one for dads. I need to quickly add that just because this list appears on my blog should in no way lead one to believe that I'm batting 1,000.

Here's a snippet...

During the holidays, dads often have a little more time to do things with their children. This is a time of year when moms definitely can use an extra hand. Few things will mean more to your wife, or help her as much, as spending extra time in beneficial activities with your children.

I often am asked to give practical suggestions to fathers. Usually, I have approached these requests in an organized fashioned that presents principles, ideas, and methods. However, a lot of really important things that all dads--including home-schooling dads--can and should do with and for their children are not subject to this kind of systematic thinking. Here are my "Top 40 Practical Ideas for Fathers" for your consideration:

1. Read your little children a story.

2. Do flash card drills to hone your children's memorization of math facts.

3. Do a science experiment with your children using Jane Hoffman's Backyard Science materials if other resources are not available.

4. Give your children their spelling tests.

5. Read your bigger children the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis.

Click here to read the whole list.

Parenting Approach Affects Depth of Children's Faith

A new Barna study surveyed young adults about their spiritual foundations and the role their parents played during their childhood in determining their Christian faith.

The study found that those who received more guidance from parents actively-engaged in applying God’s words on life and family formed deeper standards of faith in their lives.

Results of the study also showed that differing parenting techniques were used to classify the dominant parenting approaches currently used in the United States.

Although “default” and “trial-and-error parents” are both accepted approaches that enable parents to raise their children without the effort of defining their life, according to the study, “revolutionary parenting” - the approach based on one’s faith in God by making parenting a life priority - produced the most desired outcomes for Christian children exemplifying Christian morals and attitudes.

Click here to read the whole article at the Christian Post. Click here to read the Barna article referred to.

Florida: Calls Needed to Stop Expansion of State Control over Homeschoolers

(from Home School Legal Defense Fund)

Dear Florida members and friends,

The Florida legislative session began March 6, 2007. Two bills have been introduced that would affect homeschoolers by requiring them to maintain a portfolio and have their children evaluated or tested two more years.

If either Senate Bill 360 or House Bill 277 pass, the government would have control over children for an additional two years. These bills would raise the age of compulsory attendance from 16 years to 18 years. In addition, H.B. 277 would tie the ability of a minor to renew a driver's license to proving attendance in school.

We hope that your calls will cause the sponsors to withdraw the bill even before there is a hearing.

REQUESTED ACTION

Please call the sponsors of these bills, Representative Geraldine "Geri" Thompson (sponsor of H.B. 277) at (407) 245-1511 and Senator Frederica Wilson (sponsor of S.B. 360) at (305) 654-7150 to give them this message:

"Please abandon your efforts to raise the age of compulsory school attendance. It only serves as a waste of taxpayers' money; it would force unwilling, disruptive students into the classroom, and take away the right of parents to decide whether their 16-year-old is ready for valuable work experience or college."

You do not need to mention that you homeschool.

REASONS FOR OPPOSING HIGHER COMPULSORY ATTENDANCE AGE:

> Raising the compulsory attendance age will not reduce the dropout rate. In fact, the two states with the highest high school completion rates (Maryland, 94.5%, and North Dakota, 94.7%) compel attendance only to age 16, but the state with the lowest completion rate (Oregon, 75.4%) compels attendance to age 18. (These figures are three-year averages, 1996 through 1998.)

> Most states (28) only require attendance to age 16. Older children who do not want to learn cause classroom discipline problems, disruptions, and violence, making learning harder for those who truly want to learn.> Unwilling students who are forced back into the classroom are unlikely to benefit from one year of additional schooling.

> It would require homeschool families to submit to two more years of governmental red tape, and be exposed to two more years of the threat of legal action or subpoena in the event of an accusation of a violation.

> It would take away the parental freedom to decide if a 16- or 17-year-old is ready for college or the workforce. Some 16-year-olds and 17-year-olds who are not academically inclined benefit more from valuable work experience than from being forced to sit in a classroom.

> Another significant impact of expanding the compulsory attendance age would be an inevitable tax increase to pay for more classroom space and teachers to accommodate the additional students compelled to attend public schools. When California increased the age of compulsory attendance, unwilling students were so disruptive that new schools had to be built just to handle them and their behavior problems, all at the expense of the taxpayer.

For more information on compulsory attendance, please see our memorandum at http://www.hslda.org/docs/nche/Issues/E/Early_Education.asp

Yours for freedom,

Chris Klicka

HSLDA Senior Counsel

How to Raise A Godly Son

The Corinthian Man-Creed
by Shawn McEvoy

Years ago, long before my son was even an inkling, I came across that verse as I was sending my own father one of many letters I composed over the years to share with him the message and importance of salvation, and the value of life in Christ. My sister, mother, and I came to know the Lord in 1980, but it took another 17 years, seven months, and 26 days worth of praying, heart softening, and brokenness for Dan McEvoy to surrender.

And it wasn’t this letter or the above verse that pushed him into it. No, this letter I was writing simply to tell him how blessed I was to have begun dating a woman (who eventually became my wife) for whom faith came first, and I was giving God all the glory and credit and all that good stuff, and probably telling him how God delights in blessing those who trust in Him.

With the letter I enclosed a quick-and-dirty page of graphic art involving the aforementioned verse from Corinthians in some fancy font, with a clip-art picture of a sailboat, kind of as a visual aid to my letter, indicating, I suppose, what it was like for the man of God to live in this world under the Captaincy of Christ.

Well, so. After he died in 2001, I found that letter and piece of “art” in my father’s desk, looking as if it had been read and glanced at often. Something in me knew then that if I were ever to have a son, I’d commit to raising him to manhood under these same five principles:

Click here to read the whole article.

Thanks to Man in the Mirror

Great new articles on Children's Catechisms, Family Devotions, etc.

New Horizons takes Christian families seriously. They generally have at least one great article each month that I find helpful, (as a Christian father), to navigate my family in and through life with covenant faithfulness.

This month's issue is especially helpful. I encourage you to check out these articles. Read them. Digest them. Pray over them. Put them into practice. And share them with others.

Kids, Character, and Catechism by L. Charles Jackson

The Lost Art and Practice of Family Devotions by Brad Winsted

The Divines' Intent by Sidney D. Dyer

Edification—not Provocation by Arie van Eyk

If you would like to search New Horizon's great archive of past articles, click here.

Enjoy,
Dale